The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I could fuck to npr.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
