I like my sex mixed with concussions.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
