do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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