Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize