She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
