This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
