It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
