Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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