So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
My penis needs a shock collar
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
