The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
