We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
