whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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