im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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