I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
That's how pantless uber rides happen
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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