this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
