need another drink. this is the easiest way
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
