That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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