We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
