ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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