I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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