Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
