he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
