I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
