Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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