I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
