Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
