dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
