Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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