So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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