Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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