did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
His hands were made for my vagina.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
The adults are the big ones right?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
