K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I think i got beer on your cat.
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