How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
