I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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