So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
