I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
