i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Randomize
