Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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