could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
