The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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