Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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