Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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