all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
