So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize
