I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
