there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
