Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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