i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
