It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
