Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
